Ego Check! Still Bleeding

I think I'm starting to get the hang of it. Its very dangerous for a man to fall in love with a woman before she becomes interested in you. I realized that a man's job in a relationship, in any phase is to turn her on. Nevermind the sex, the kiss or the hug. Just turn her on. And how do you about doing this? Light her on fire when she isn't looking. Ha! Just kidding.

Conversation
The most important part of the seduction game or making a girl be interested in you is thru conversation. Growing up, I'm the nerd type. I used to think that having good grades then having great job after getting a good grade is a surefire way to meet the woman you want. Turns out, Johnny the dropout can get any girls he wants even without money. I think that parents are right when they ingrained in me that grades are good and studying leads to better future. But I think its only half of the equation. Being successful, to me I think is not having a good job, car or house and lots of money. Its about having a good job, car or house and lots of money AND share it with the hot blonde that you met at your local grocery store. Success in other words is to change the course of your life in any way you want in an instant. Men, are social creatures too. Even though they become introverted in studying too much, they will, hunt for a female companion to make the journey more bearable and fun. I think that's where I am lacking right now. Its the getting the female companion part.

Losing the ego
I think the most charming people out there are not the ones that hold great opinion on something and stand by their ground. If in fact that is the case, then we would have loved our politicians to the bones. But its kind of the opposite. I think the most charming people are the ones that have no ego. As if anything that happen are ok and they have fun to whatever the situation brings, good or bad. And they make it funny when situations are bad especially. I am in this stage of losing my ego. I get off the track when the girl says "I love Robert Downey Jr" or "I love Iron Man" or "Thor is Hot". Mr. Super Ego gets hurt and wants to be hulk. In my mind I thought I was being compared to a celebrity. I thought of it as a negative thing, well in fact its a good thing because the girl is sharing her emotions. I could have done and said something like "I also love Robert/Ironman/Thor. I think they are great/cool/very attractive. But if I could be like them, I would want my power to be different. I want my power to be the power of tickle. So I can just tickle the enemy and we all be friends." Its making fun of the situation. The problem here would be is thinking of a reply. And it will be a lot of practice. I think losing the ego first. Then enjoying the answer 2nd. Then add more fun/humor to her answer.

Pacing the Conversation
A guru said that the best way to come up with a witty reply/comeback to a statement is to pace the conversation. That is, you should be the one dictating the pace of the conversation. Don't try to chase or answer quickly. Try to think of an answer before replying and make sure its 1. disqualifying and 2. its a statement 3. funny. Practice makes perfect. The only way to practice this is thru conscious effort. Making each and every conversation go to the pace you are comfortable with. It doesn't have to be a conversation with a girl. Guy friends or family or the stranger you met at the local grocery store can be a good practice dummy. Always remember that being charming is a skill. If you have fun, its always a win win situation.

Disqualify Yourself
A sub part of losing the ego is disqualifying yourself as a potential mate. When most guys in her circle will try to compete for her attention, the alpha male is so secure in his ability, he will not compete with those guys because he knows there is no need. If the girl says "I love people who can play the guitar". You'll reply with a disqualifying statement "I love guitar players as well and try to be like them. I'd like to think of myself as a good guitar player, but the only songs I can play are songs for nursery kids or songs with only 2 chords.". You want to have fun in the conversation and nevermind about her standards. People will always have standards and they will be pretty high and you'll never ever meet it. The only way to make someone like you is to be a different person, disqualify yourself from that standards.

I'm Still Bleeding Inside But Life Has To Go On

I'm still missing the girl I had a date with last wednesday. I can totally see this girl as someone I can settle down with. But that is what happens when the perfect girl comes and you don't have game. You miss the opportunity. But I don't want to do anything stupid for her to shut me off permanently. Though I did made her feel awkward, I might have been brought down to the list of guys she wanted to go steady with.

This is hard for me to swallow. I have always been so prideful and egotistic about being the only choice. But perhaps a guru was correct that we should have no ego at all. Whatever the girl decides, dates other guys, you must be contented to be in that list, no matter how far behind are you. You can not really control those things, what your competitor is doing or how she feels. Just be in that list so when the other guys messed up, you're up for the bat and maybe next time, it could be a home run. Lose the ego.

Maaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

Rejection - Acceptance

I guess I have to accept the fact that women will reject guys like me more than any normal guy out there. Being a nerd, I have always known women will reject me. But the self improvement continues on. Even though I thought that I did great on that date, a man has to move on, improve and explore more things. I'm done listening to love songs and I'm moving on.

Day 2: Date Aftermath No Comm

This is the hard part for me. I'm feeling really disappointed in my self. I think I could have done better in my last date. Thinking about it now. I think I were to lax and calm about it and made her awkward. Well, I think the ball is on her now. Not to mention he kept mentioning iron man and how he is her ideal guy, I'm starting to feel like an impotent man.

So I Went on a Date Today

I went on a date. Even though I have a huge ass pimple on my nose, I realized that I need to do this which is better than nothing. The pimple can come and go, and my date may not like me because of it, but I think the lesson that will be learned here will stay with me for a lifetime.

We went to the mall. I wanted to treat her to the movies. And she promised to treat me on her payday. Sounds fair enough for me. On the movie theatre, I tried to hold her hand when the scene is scary and she does seem like scared and covering her face. So I offered my hand and hold her. But just a few minutes, she took it off. This is the first rejection for me and I felt that I don't have this girl yet.

Then we went to eat. I tried to be funny. She does seem like genuinely smiling. But I'm just not sure if being persistent in filming her using my phone is a good idea. She is camera shy. This is where, I think I really messed up. I should have kept my phone in my pocket. But she looks so cute when being filmed. And I thought she doesn't mind.

I tried to hold her hand again while we were walking. But the fucking handbag is in the way. Always. I tried to tell her I'll carry the bag so I have the chance to actually hold her hand. But dumb fool me didn't spoke anything and just said, ok when she said she dont want men to carry her bag.

The part of the date where we part ways. I think here, she is just being polite in giving me the goodbye kiss and hug. But for me, it seems fake. She promised to take me out in return for another date. But I don't want to keep my hopes up.

I'm Drunk and I think I'm inlove

I have this girl that I have been in love with for a couple of years. A few weeks earlier, I think I have escalated into a more intimate relationship with her. She told me she likes me. But when it comes to love, she said that her heart is happy and she has yet to know what to feel once we meet again on wednesday.

I'm inlove with this girl.

Its Time To Change

Today I decided to change for the better. Not for me to get chicks. But for me to be deserving of the girl I'm about to go steady with in the future. I realized that if I want a really quality girl. I must also be a quality man to deserve her. I went out today and visited my dentist. He strongly suggest I get braces because of the gaps in my teeth. I don't really want to spend money right now. But what the heck, invest in thyself... After all this year, I only bought books. Thinking that the term "invest in yourself" meant educating yourself. I realized that it also goes for the outside appearance. So I agreed. I'm scheduled for braces this coming week.

Next is I bought a decent watch. The only 2 accessories that makes a man is his watch and his shoes. I don't have any elegant shoes at the moment and I still love my sneakers. I love the watch, I think its a good investment as well.

Next will be to enroll in a gym. This one is easy as I like to go to the gym.