The Search for Charisma

Is charisma something you are born with? Is it some kind of a gift from the Gods that only a few people manage to receive and live a life of pure pleasure and success?

These are the questions that come into my mind whenever I get rejected by girls that I like. I used to think that charisma was something you are born with, a blessing from the gods. But recently, I realized that charisma is a skill that can be learned.

I have discovered that being charismatic have 3 important recipe; Presence, Power and Warmth.

Presence is the most important of the 3. Its the sense of being in the moment. To focus your attention to a girl or an activity. I like girls that are so deep into an activity. They are attractive during those times. And I found out the reason why. It is presence. Presence makes people feel special. It is not compliments that make them feel happy. It is your undivided attention. It is the unspoken language. It is what makes people see you as different.

Power makes people feel secure around you. Power gives people the impression that you can change their lives. Power is not merely seen by being in a position of authority. Although most of the time it is. Power is in the ease of movement and being relaxed in every moment. Power to master your emotions and to protect your confidence. Power is to how good is your body language to project charm. Power can also be seen and expressed by having intelligence and money. Power for me, is being relaxed at all times.

Warmth makes people want to like you. If power is the ability to change a person's life, it is in 2 ways, good or bad. People want the good and warmth gives them the assurance that you're in for the better. It cements your charm into them. You are powerful but at the same time you won't do anything bad for them. In fact, you'll do good things for them. They will stick around.